Living with an unknown mental disorder
Personal Narrative
By Zoey Davis, Editor
In 2021, I was going into seventh grade. I had no friends; I had lost touch with my old friends over the summer because of conflicts and growing apart. I felt very lonely and embarrassed, and everyone had already built their own friend groups.
I experienced extreme worry and self-consciousness walking into school, being in class and sitting alone at lunch. I had only a few people I would talk to, and none of them on a personal level.
As school continued, people started to talk to me. A girl who sat beside me in my science class complimented my makeup. This same girl sat behind me in the homeroom, as we had similar last names. She introduced me to her friend group. I finally made friends of my own after losing all my previous ones.
Throughout seventh grade, I noticed I would get awful stomachaches and horrible anxiety. In turn, I started talking to the guidance counselor at Kimpton and spending more time in the nurse’s office. I spent months complaining about the stomachaches I was having, how they affected my sleep, my appetite and my ability to even get up some days.
After a few months of missing school days and spending back-to-back periods in the nurse’s office, my mother finally scheduled a doctor’s appointment. My doctor told me it was probably just normal anxiety and that it would pass.
I continued feeling this anxiety and extreme pain in my stomach until freshman year. My condition got worse, and I dealt with harsher anxiety, more stomachaches, heartburn and even shakiness in my legs. I was put on anxiety medication and medicine for both heartburn and stomachaches.
My condition stayed constant, and I started experiencing extreme anxiety attacks. There were days when I couldn’t even get out of bed–I was stuck in pain. The medication they had me on wasn’t working, including my pain medication. I started using larger amounts of Ibuprofen, amounts that would surely kill my liver. I completely abandoned my prescribed medications, filled with rage about the ineffectiveness of the medication.
There were many days I struggled with the motivation to get out of bed, grappling with the mental and physical frustrations. I felt too anxious or sick to get up, too overwhelmed by even everyday tasks. Other days, starting an assignment, cleaning my room or something as simple as talking with friends, felt like an impossible task to complete.
I felt as if no doctors were listening to me; every doctor’s appointment felt the same. Between Psychologists, Gastroenterologists, MFM’s, Neurologists, Cardiologists and Immunologists, I felt hopeless. Doctors kept ordering tests. I’ve gone through MRIs, scopes, brain tests, asthmatic tests and blood tests, and I continued to receive the same news, regardless of the specialists to whom I went.
Fortunately, I was finally given one diagnosis among all those doctors and tests: Functional Neurological Disorder, also referred to as FND. Unfortunately, research on this disorder is scarce, and there isn’t much I can do to help with the diagnosis. FND is a disruption in the brain and body; simply put, my brain is sending signals to my body that it isn’t supposed to be doing.
I went through therapy to try and help my symptoms, ways I could ‘calm’ myself down when experiencing an ‘attack.’ Therapy did nothing for me, as there was no reason why I was having these symptoms. I couldn’t calm myself down when experiencing a symptom, as I wasn’t anxious, and it happened all the time. Again, my condition dwindled to anxiety.
I got angry about being diagnosed with no resolution, at therapy being a waste of time, at doctors for not listening to me and for being taken on and off medications I couldn’t even be on long enough to remember. I stopped taking all my medications and stopped going to therapy and doctors’ appointments. I gave up on my health, deciding to just work through it.
When you lose the complete motivation and physical capability to do most things, this also includes personal hygiene. Recently, I’ve been getting better at keeping up with my hygiene, but in earlier years, it was shameful. I was very embarrassed and riddled with guilt at the state I was in most days.
I had days and weeks without showering, brushing my teeth and hair, etc. On days when it was physically impossible for me to get out of bed, my hygiene was the least of my concerns. Days where even just changing my clothes would be considered a win, showering seemed so far away.
My attendance also suffered immensely; I went the whole school year of my sophomore year without going a full week once, sometimes missing an entire week. My relationships also suffered with my friends and family. I stopped hanging out with friends, feeling too ill to go or stopped full communication. I felt as if my family couldn’t understand, that they didn’t believe me–I had arguments about my attendance, my social life and even my own condition.
I felt isolated, so I started throwing myself into my school work. I figured if I had anything, it would be education. I tried so hard to keep up with my classes, making up work as fast as I could, or studying harder to make up a test in two days. I achieved my goal; I ended my sophomore year with a 4.3 GPA, although I had 200 absent hours, not including medical absences.
Going into junior year, my stomachaches became less of an issue, and heartburn turned to once a month. Although new issues arose, the shakiness in my legs became worse, my heart rate was elevated above normal rates, and I couldn’t go a day without feeling like I was about to pass out. The shakiness developed into constant pain in my legs. At night, I can remember crying because the pain was so bad I couldn’t sleep.
I had to go back to the doctors; it was all too much to ignore. As I sat down for the first appointment back, I felt listened to, I felt heard. After many visits back, I was also diagnosed with Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, commonly known as POTS. POTS is a cardiovascular disorder that makes my heart jump to high rates and makes me feel lightheaded, dizzy and nauseous.
Anxiety, FND and POTS all share symptoms that can make it difficult for doctors to diagnose, which is why it took my doctors 4-5 years to diagnose me, alongside ongoing health problems that haven’t been properly diagnosed. Chronic illness on top of a mental disorder that makes it hard to function mentally is exhausting.
With the recent diagnosis, I didn’t know how to feel. I felt like it answered some questions but left others unanswered. I was glad for the diagnosis, as it would help my symptoms become more serious and real to others.
Currently, I still suffer from chronic leg pain; I can’t stand up without my vision going blank, and the lightheaded feeling of passing out haunts me every day. I still have many specialists to see just to get some idea of my ongoing health and mental concerns.
I live most of my days in constant worry about my grade, my family, my friends and especially my health. I can feel the strength of my legs deteriorating. I’m scared that one day it’ll get so bad I can’t walk anymore. I live in fear that I’ll never be healthy, and I’ll be stuck on medication for the rest of my life. A life that I thought would never happen to me is closer than I think. Actively feeling my own brain and body work against each other is terrifying.
Girls and Boys’ bowling teams find success despite hardships
By Halah Anwaar, Social Media Manager
Both bowling teams have had a strong season marked by consistent scores and steady improvement. With hard work in practice, translating to results in matches, the team continues to compete with confidence.
With bowling there are specific factors that stand out to individuals, motivating them to keep playing. These interests can vary from person to person and for junior Olivia Kolczynski, who has been bowling competitively for three years.
“Within bowling there are a lot of different types of people, and us as a team definitely get together well. Most teams we compete against are also incredibly kind and supportive. I also like that bowling is a less physical sport and more mental,” Kolczynski said.
With every new season comes different obstacles. The team can push past those obstacles by building resilience, supporting one another, and staying focused on shared goals.
“I would say our biggest challenge this year is focusing. Many of us on the team lose focus fast due to either others on the team or just the general environment of the alleys. We overcome this by making sure we focus on the approach and just zone out the environment by focusing on our mechanics and making good shots,” Kolczynski said.
A type of play the team encounters during the season is something called a Baker game. Baker games are a team format where five players combine to bowl a single 10-frame game, with each player responsible for two frames in a specific rotation. Teamwork is the most important aspect along with skill, but this year, the players are struggling.
“Teamwork is really important. I want to bring back team chants and reactions for strikes and spares to boost morale. We do well individually, but Baker games are where we struggle the most, so improving teamwork there is key,” senior captain Dillin Rogers said.
Growth is a given when working hard. With a sport, growth for an individual as well as for a team can come in various different forms. Senior Olyvia Janka, who has been bowling with the team for the past two years, believes that the team has seen improvement.
“The team has grown to not only bowl better, but also to communicate with each other better and be there for each other,” Janka said.
Boys’ head coach, Paul Tucholski, explained how this season he wants to focus on growing the students to have more confidence in themselves. The bowling team is suffering a bad mental wave where they allow past frames which affects how they play. Tucholski hopes to fix that.
“I want them to listen to the coaches, not what other team members think. I want my team members to always forget what they did in the last frame and focus on doing better in the next one,” Tucholski said.
Along with Tucholski, Rogers agrees there is an issue with team work, stating the problem does not come from dislike of players, but they themselves getting upset which brings down team morale.
“Some players have big egos and get upset about being benched, which affects the whole team,” Rogers said.
Being a team captain can mean a lot of different things. For Kolczynski, it means being a helping hand for her team.
“As a captain, I help organize the team together for matches and tournaments, figure out lineups for bakers and assist in ways the coaches need such as giving advice, going to assist in JV events and just being a reliable person for the team,” Kolczynski said.
Progress can be a key factor to performing better in sports. Players can not only improve upon skills but also in their mindset. Junior Violet Shall believes this has greatly affected their team.
“I see a lot of improvements especially in the structure of the team, last year felt unstructured due to coaching changes and a lack of people. This year we have way more people and everything moves more smoothly,” Shall said.
Q&A with new BOE members, Whitacre and Moyer
By Gianna Jacobs, Staff Writer
Jason Whitacre, President
Q: What is your role on the board of education?
A: I serve as an at-large member of the Board of Education, which means I represent the entire district. At our most recent meeting, the board also elected me to serve as Board President for 2026.
Q: What is your number one motivation for being on the Board of Education?
A: My biggest motivation is working with others to make thoughtful decisions for the district. I really value hearing different opinions and perspectives, and I believe my legal background helps bring a different way of thinking to the table as we work together.
Q: What are your main goals and priorities now that you have been elected?
A: That’s a tough question because there’s a lot to focus on. Overall, I care a lot about having clear, fair and consistent processes in place. My goal is to help create systems that lead to long-term success—not just quick fixes—and that continue to benefit the district even after my term ends.
Q: How did your schooling/education affect you joining?
A: My education actually made me hesitant at first. As a political science major, I studied how lobbying can influence government decisions, which made me a bit cynical about politics. That experience stuck with me, but it also helps me stay grounded and avoid being overly influenced by outside pressure or special interest groups.
Q: What specific steps will you take in your first 100 days to address one of these key issues?
A: The board is already working on our next strategic plan, and my focus is helping us be more intentional and proactive rather than reactive. I hope you’ll notice better conversations at public meetings, a thoughtful approach to hiring our next treasurer and a stronger effort to move past personal politics and focus on what really matters.
Q: What do you believe is the single biggest challenge the community faces, and what makes you think that?
A: One of our biggest challenges is staying focused. There’s a constant stream of controversial topics coming from state, national and global politics, many of which the school board can’t actually control. While those issues matter, we need to stay centered on what we can do to support students and schools.
Q: How do you plan to collaborate effectively with other elected officials and city staff to achieve your goals?
A: Good communication is key. I make an effort to talk with people who don’t always think the same way I do and avoid staying in a political bubble. Disagreements are normal, but we usually have more in common than it seems—and staying connected makes it easier to get things done.
Q: How will you handle public criticism or disagreement with your decisions?
A: Criticism comes with the job, and I’ve experienced plenty of it already. I try to listen respectfully without losing sight of my values. I’ve also chosen not to engage on social media during my term because I believe real conversations—face to face—are much more productive and meaningful.
Q: What specific skills and experience do you bring that will be beneficial to you as a board member?
A:I’m a licensed attorney with over 20 years of experience, much of it related to issues schools face. I’ve also served a full term on the board, including being president during COVID and vice president the year after. I tend to focus on fairness and consistency in how decisions are made, not just the outcome of one issue.
Q: What do you believe is the fundamental role of a board member in our community?
A: Board members are elected to represent the community by listening, asking questions and setting policy. We’re not meant to run the day-to-day operations—that’s handled by the district’s professionals. One of my most important roles is helping communicate between the community and the school district.
Q: What do you think is the biggest issue in the community right now?
A: We’ve become more divided than ever. Social media and constant online communication make it easier to misunderstand each other and harder to connect as people. I think we sometimes forget how much we actually have in common.
Q: What is your mission statement for the school year district wide?
A: The district already has a mission statement, and it’s important that board members support it rather than create their own. That said, I’m really interested in hearing what students think about it—whether it feels meaningful to you and whether you think the board actually follows it.
Q: What big changes are coming to Stow that are going to affect the students?
A: Many major changes affecting students come from outside the district, like the new Ohio cell phone law. From the board’s side, I hope you’ll see positive changes—better facilities, stronger community focus and more board members showing up to support and celebrate students at events.
Q: What is one thing you feel the students in Stow deserve or need the most?
A: Students need adults who stay focused on supporting them. It’s easy for adults to get distracted by political debates or trending issues, but our job is to stay centered on helping students learn, grow and succeed.
Q: What is the most important role a board member should offer the community in which they are representing.
A: Board members need to listen, respect different viewpoints and make informed decisions—even when those decisions aren’t popular. We can’t please everyone all the time, and that can’t be our goal. Being transparent, thoughtful and focused on the long-term good of the community is what really matters.
John Moyer, Vice President
Q: What is your role on the board of education?
A: I am currently the Vice President.
Q: What is your number one motivation for being on the Board of Education?
A: I enjoyed my time as a teacher at SMFHS. Serving on the school board is another way for me to be involved in helping our schools. I’m also interested in leadership development, which is something I can contribute to our board.
Q: What are your main goals and priorities now that you have been elected?
A: I hope to continue to uphold strong academics delivered in a welcoming environment. I would like the SMF Schools to be the preferred choice for many students and families.
Q: What specific steps will you take in your first 100 days to address one of these key issues?
A: Deeply listening while supporting consistent policies and procedures to support the goals above.
Q: What do you believe is the single biggest challenge the community faces, and what makes you think that?
A: One current challenge is the way that schools are funded in Ohio. We are seeing decreased state support in real dollars while also experiencing, like many households, increasing costs.
Q: How do you plan to collaborate effectively with other elected officials and city staff to achieve your goals?
A: Deeply listening, sharing what I am fairly certain of and what I am unsure about while discussing the common goal(s) we have.
Q: How will you handle public criticism or disagreement with your decisions?
A: Sometimes the criticism has merit; a decision was wrongheaded. Sometimes listening to the song beneath the words is where clarity comes.
Q: What specific skills and experience do you bring that will be beneficial to you as a board member?
A: I have a long experience in education in our district. I’m also a current leadership consultant, mostly in the field of education.
Q: What do you believe is the fundamental role of a board member in our community?
A: To listen to the community members and think of how we can be the best school district while weighing differing views. It’s about overall governance while the district leaders manage the day-to-day happenings.
Q: What do you think is the biggest issue in the community right now?
A: In communities across the country, there is divisiveness on a number of issues. This can prove to be challenging in making progress on important issues.
Q: What big changes are coming to Stow that are going to affect the students?
A: The world continues to grow more volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous. How can we best help our students to thrive in that world?
Q: What is one thing you feel the students in Stow deserve or need the most?
A: Someone to listen to them. You can learn a lot from talking with young people.
Q: What is the most important role a board member should offer the community in which they are representing.
A: Deeply listening, sharing what I am fairly certain and what I am unsure about while discussing common goal(s) we have.
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